The Morning Moment ArchiveContents Page

Note: Links become active as the posts are transferred to this page

1. 11/06/02 The First Morning Moment

2. 12/17/02 The Greatest Gift

3. 1/01/03 Resolutions

4. 1/20/03 Our Greatest Gifts

5. 2/23/03 Starfish on the Beach

6. 3/09/03 Stillness and Inner Peace

7. 3/17/03 Aloha & the Divine Universe

8. 3/26/03 The Makahiki Firewalk

9. 4/08/03 Thoughts on Sand

10. 4/18/03 Let Go of the Rock!

11. 4/27/03 Let Go of the Rock, Part II

12. 5/11/27/03 Expedience Emerging

13. 5/18/03 Waterfall Passages

14. 5/30/03 Ripples

15. 6/22/03 Heaven Interrupted

16. 7/04/03 Heaven Inculcated

17. 07/06/03 Heaven Intersected

18. 09/26/03 The Valley of the Unknown

19. 10/18/03 The Hado of Our Thoughts

20. 11/27/03 Thoughts on Thanksgiving

21. 1/1/04 Sunrise: A Grand New Year!

22. 2/26/04 The Truth Experiment

23. 4/20/04 Embracing the Blob

24. 5/11/04 Maui Provides

25. 5/16/04 See, The Blob Ain’t So Bad!

26. 5/30/04 Embracing Your Inner Princess

27. 6/22/04 Riding the Wave

28. 7/22/04 Talking About the Weather

29. 8/3/04 Miracles Abound

30. 8/20/04 Into the Darkness We Gaze

31. 9/17/04 To Quiet the Roar of the Beast

32. 11/11/04 Talking About Turtles

33. 11/19/04 Searching For Acceptance

34. 11/25/04 Thoughts on Another Thanksgiving

35. 12/25/04 December the 25th!

36. 6/21/06 The Frog and The Crocodile

37. 6/30/06 This Town Ain’t Big Enough!

38. 7/22/06 We Wear the Mask

39. 7/25/06 Masks? We Don’t Need No Stinkin’ Masks

40. 8/15/06 The Minstrel in the Mind

41. 8/20/06 I Want My BetaMax, Or Do I?

42. 9/13/06 Take a Bite Out of Blaming!

43. 9/26/07 Why Bother?

Written Word © 2002-2014 Holman R. Meyerhoffer
All Rights Reserved.

The First Morning MomentHow it all began, quite by "accident."

Nov. 6th, 2002

Welcome to the Morning Moment Archive!

Within these pages you will find words of inspiration, encouragement and the

wisdom of Spirit expressing Itself through the journey of my life. These are my thoughts, written down to help me embrace a new and better way of living, loving, relating and being. To help me learn to do things differently and better. It is my journey toward greater self-acceptance, awareness and growth.

Quite by “accident”, I discovered that sharing my thoughts and my joy, my pain, my lessons and my learning was meaningful and perhaps even transformative for others who also desire to dance with the evolutionary impulse of recognizing and realizing the many faces within the One Face. I hope you find someone thought provoking and meaningful as you wander through this part of my life, which is your life, which is the Eternal Life that we all share as Whole and part, Weaver and woven, Love embracing the Kosmos, One with All. How beautiful it is, how magnificent, how joyous! How very like the morning. (Especially when you can sleep through it…)

The First Morning Moment

Another Beautiful Day Dawns.

And with it comes all the limitless potentiality of the present now moment, that space of eternal stillness where all that is real happens. So I think about all that is unreal, on some level or another: our projections, imaginations, fears, limiting patterns, conditioning, thoughtless non-responsiveness -- all the things that pull us relentlessly away from the beauty of right now. A part of my self stands forward and cries, "Stop!"

Center, Breath, Be.

Ahh, there is calm; there is peace; there is happiness; there is contentment. And I say, thank you for sharing this moment with me.

Today I am different. Today I share the sentiment of Ebenezer Scrooge when he

exclaimed: "I'm not the man I once was."

So, to carry the moment forward, to allow it to propagate itself like mitosis, each wondrous moment of limitless potentiality splitting off into the next becomes my priority and my pleasure. A part of my self stands forward and cries, "Right on!" <= (the happy hippie part, ha!)

Today I celebrate; today I laugh; today I cry. Today -- I simply am.

And you are too!

With love and aloha,

Holman

Update (May 21st, 2014): As I re-post these old thoughts and reflections in this new format, I get a chance to re-experience them as new, to re-think and re-reflect. A lot of time has passed and with it a lot of water under the bridge. I remember this day, not much of it, but I remember sitting down at the computer and putting words to what I was feeling. Much of these essays came from the intense personal pain I was going through. The confusion and uncertainty, the conflict and chaos gave rise to some of my greatest moments of insight. Pain sucks, but oh what we can learn from it. In this moment I feel the sadness of my suffering and the uplifting triumph of translating hardships into resolve and suffering into deep spiritual feelings. I am grateful for this reminder.

The Greatest Gift

Dec, 17th, 2002

Another morning dawns. The pale winter sun peeks down and smiles at its reflection in the puddles of a cleansing rain. The new day adds its celestial rays to the twinkling chorus of Christmas lights and we know it’s that time of year yet once again. The children sing silly songs and their parents brave the mall. We celebrate our relationships with presents and packages all wrapped up in ribbons and bows.

Perhaps the greatest gift we can give each other takes a more profound shape than a simple box, no matter how prettily packaged or skillfully wrapped. As we reflect more deeply on what all our presents and gifts mean, as we move into the heart-space from whence our gratitude springs, we can begin to bring out and deliver the true gifts of the season. We don’t even need to engage the services of UPS or the postal service for these presents to find their way under the tree.

The gift that strengthens and celebrates our loves and relationships isn’t a new sweater or even a new car, but rather the simple authenticity of our true selves.

The gift that "keeps on giving" is a return to the center of things, the basics upon which love and friendship are built. This gift is re-wrapping and re-giving simple considerations and commonalities that brought us together in the first place, coupled with a new determination to “do it differently”. A concrete commitment to learn new tools, to get really real with ourselves, to endlessly uplift, appreciate, and build genuine friendships with our lovers, partners, children and friends is a gift that goes outside the box. Sweaters fade or unravel; cars break down – but when we change ourselves and the way we interact with everyone we love, our whole universe changes with us.

Thank you for spending this morning moment with me. Let’s celebrate together as we exchange our most heart felt gifts this Christmas season.

Aloha, Peace,Wellness, oh and a Very, Merry Christmas,

Holman

Update (May 22nd, 2014): Just this morning, a wonderful, spring morning with

Christmas as far away as the Land of Never Never from our minds, someone I treasure was telling me about an email she'd written to a former spouse. "He would never treat another woman like that," she said to me.

     "Why do we do that?" I asked, sardonically. 

     "Do what?" She asked.

     "Treat the people closest to us worse than total strangers?" Then to reinforce the point, I added "We should yell at total strangers and abuse people we don't even know, and give nothing but love and respect to those closest to us and those with whom we interact most frequently."

     Being who she is, she responded, "Why don't we just learn to love and treat everyone equally?"

Indeed. Why don't we?

The point is, relationships are difficult and the more interaction is involved, the more difficult the relationship becomes. This is why our greatest gift to a relationship is to treat it like a stranger! Surely our loved ones, our co-workers, and our friends are worth at least as much effort as we put into our positive public face, the one we show to strangers. Let's give each other the gift of renewed appreciation for what drew us together in the first place. Let's give each other the gift of forgiveness and a fresh start. It is as easy as letting go, letting go of the sour thoughts we cling to rotting in our memory of past hurts or perceptions of wrong doing. My friend Kahuna Lani used to say, "Just drop your dead duck." I mean, really, it's getting stinky and gross in our grasp. Why don't we just drop it? These hurts and grievances are nothing more that thoughts. So, if we let them go, it becomes easy again to see the beauty in a relationship, if any beauty is left. A duck in flight is astonishing and beautiful; a dead duck -- not so much. Let's all drop our dead ducks.

Let's celebrate, exaggerate, renew, remember, and recreate all the beauty that is possible in every relationship we have! Now that's a great gift indeed.

Resolutions

Jan. 1st, 2003

Aloha and Good Morning,

         Welcome to the first day, and the first morning of a brand new year: the one time that our culture actually encourages and supports our desire to learn to do things differently, to resolve to change, to resolve to grow, to make a space for what we desire for our selves.

         So let’s jump into the morning of the New Year with enthusiastic good cheer and with a genuine, reflective determination to discover realistic, practical, actually do-able resolutions that will renew our journey towards a closer alignment with our authentic life path and a closer realization of our true soul needs.

         We’ve heard the phrase: “God don’t make no junk.” How true that is. Yet consider this, have we not inherited our own divine nature, our own higher self?

Is that not a part of our birthright? Will we not rightly say: “We don’t make no junk!” Our lives are our responsibility and our joy and our opportunity. Let’s make this the morning, let’s make this the year we go for it! Our divine nature is simply a part of us, a splendid and magnificent part of us; therefore, we can always turn within for guidance and wisdom. When we turn within with a genuine desire for change, what we need to do will always come to mind. The more clear our intent, the more clearly we will know what to do, what resolutions to make on this New Year’s day which create the new me and the new you that we desire.

       So as we jump into the morning of the new year with enthusiastic good cheer and with a genuine, reflective determination to discover those few, tiny-little-first-steps that renew our journey towards closer alignment with our authentic life path, let us celebrate the beauty and joy that accompanies the evolution of our soul. Let us open up to a greater experience of the divine within ourselves and the satisfaction of self discovery, the joy of personal growth. This is the ripple that flows through everything and everyone we touch. Our families, our friends, our lovers and partners, wives, husbands and children will wake up amazed one morning with the realization that we have become “new and improved” people, and even more amazingly – so have they. We have the power to change, right now, how we think, act, react, respond and to realize the divine within us.

         May the new morning awaken this desire within us. May we take as long as it takes! May we truly make this year the year in which our resolutions enrich our lives because we do them!

         May the richest blessings and abundance flow into your lives and into your hearts and into your families. Thank you for spending this morning moment with me.

Peace, wellness and a Happy New Year,

Holman

Update May 25th, 2014

         I am struck by two thoughts as I read this over again for the first time in a number of years. The second thought has to do with ripples; the first with the twin pathways to the Divine that are really just one path: this Moebius strip of Spirit expressing. You know, you take a strip of paper and curl it around into a circle, but just before you join the edges with superglue, you put a twist in the paper. When you do this, you can trace the surface with a pencil and cover both "sides" without ever lifting the pencil off the paper. Freaky, right? What was once clearly two sided, lost one of it's sides. The two become one. But let's talk about ripples first and for the sake of brevity, I'll save the other for another time.

     
   Once, I lived with two beautiful women, Jennifer and Monica. I adored them both.Monica was my partner at the time and together, we were roommates with Jennifer. It was truly a lovely and treasured time in my life.

         One day, only a little while before Monica and I moved in with Jen, I was sitting on her couch and she was standing across the room from me, pouring out her heart and her confusion about a situation she was experiencing in her dating life.
       
           "Oh Holman," she'd cried. "Is there something wrong with me?"
         "Absolutely not," I reassured her and then went on to tell her precisely why there was nothing wrong with her. Life is just plain hard, and all to often we don't know how to walk through it with the grace and divinity that is our birthright.

         I only vaguely remember the details. Nor can I recall what it was exactly that sparked a moment of insight; but as insight goes, I instantly knew more that I had known a micro moment before.

         When I was a kid, bless his heart, my Dad yelled a lot. I quickly discovered that if I said anything to excuse or defend myself, he yelled more. As I write this, I'm realizing the hidden gold in that collection of seemingly unpleasant moments. I learned how to hold my tongue. I learned to be careful in my words. Since words matter; since words can hurt, or words can heal, learning to be aware of my use of them is truly a valuable gift. 

Finding hidden gold in difficult circumstances

         On the other side, I developed the mistaken idea that if I didn't engage, that if I didn't yell back, if I didn't say the snide and mean things that popped into my mind during conflict -- then I was  being the superior man. I mistook my self-righteousness for reality.

         So, I'm talking to Jennifer and suddenly, just like that, I know better. Monitoring and controlling my words, or even my body language is a valuable beginning; but ultimately, it's only half the ball game. To really win, I needed to learn to refine and monitor the energy that was flowing between me and my conflict partner (thought and emotions are made of energy). "If looks could kill," the saying goes. People can feel what we are broadcasting. Even if they are not consciously aware of it, people both feel and react to the energy of thought and emotion that we are projecting. If our thoughts or emotions are negative or violent, people know it, consciously or unconsciously, people know it. If our thoughts or emotions are loving and kind, well, people feel that too, and then they respond to it. 

         Think about it, our thoughts and emotions help determine and shape other people's behavior and response patterns. That's heavy stuff, man. This is the ultimate understanding of self-responsibility.

         We are stars and we burn bright! 

We are stars!

         We are unceasingly bombarding the energy of our being, the energetic quality of our thoughts and emotions in every direction, for good or for ill. And just like a star we can blast a concentrated beam of energy, our own solar flare, out into space. But unlike a star, we can project this solar flare directly at the target of our attention. In massage school, they frequently told us, "Energy goes where attention flows." There is no end to energy; it flows and flows and then keeps on flowing. Yet, for us, energy will flow where we direct it.

         If I am angry and I refrain from yelling mean and hurtful things, that is all to the good. Who wants to be mean  or hurtful? Yet, if I am angry and in my stony silence, I glare daggers -- I have formed my solar flare and shaped it into a nuclear missile and launched it, silent but deadly, at my enemy. When the hateful energy blasts over my conflict partner, it hurts them. They will respond to that hurt; consciously or not, their behavior will be altered. Their response to me  will be distorted. Even more sadly, that distortion might propagate itself in an ongoing cycle of negativity as the hurt I created is passed on as poison to others all around. People have within them all possible human emotions and all possible human actions. We call out, we invite emotions and actions as direct responses to the energy we project as we interact, as well as the words we say or the way we behave.

         My exchange with Jennifer that day taught me that I needed to take responsibility for both my words AND the energy of my thoughts and emotions. Both can be formed into weapons and prove hurtful. I don't wish to be hurtful.

         Obviously, it's taking the game to a new level and it's hard: this thing about being self-responsible. Becoming aware of the need to monitor and refine the energy I broadcast was the first step and all of life's experiences offer an opportunity to practice. I am grateful to you, my imaginary reader, for affording me a reminder. Reminders are good and necessary, lest we get completely caught up in the urgency of the game and forget the finer things of Spirit; lest we forget the greater value in refining the way we move through the dream of this world and slumber on. May we awaken to our finest being, the expression of Divinity that we truly are.

Our Greatest Gifts

 Jan. 20th, 2003

         This morning, as I spent a quite moment in meditation, I began to think about the gifts that flow from the universe, from spirit, from God in such rich abundance into our lives each and every moment. I thought about how easy it is to dismiss them, take them for granted or miss them entirely. Some of our greatest, most precious gifts sit gathering dust or growing moss right before us covered as they are by the invisible blanket of familiarity.

         I know my relationships can be like that if I’m

not really careful. I treasure my Beloved boundlessly, and all the other beloveds in my life. This morning it’s time to dust them off! The moss comes off my relationships when I express my truths out loud, when I choose to “accentuate the positive” and then share it with the beloveds in my life. The heart, like all muscles, grows stronger when we exercise it. I, and everyone else I know, crave acceptance and need to feel loved. This is the sunshine on our souls that creates a sacred, safe place for us to grow.

         Part of the job of raising our consciousness is becoming more aware, part of the process of becoming more aware is to open our hearts to the

emotional environment that circles and swirls around us every moment. Then take charge of it. I say circular because the primary emotions we feel are principle in creating the intentions that color our perceptions. Our perceptions create the events that unfold in our lives. Our intentions flow out from us on an unconscious level and in a giant circle flow right back to us.

         So, this morning, take a moment to tell your loved ones how much you

appreciate them. Tell them how their presence in your life enriches you. Be specific. Do this with the intention of brightening their day, of sharing the love and appreciation that flows from your heart to theirs. Do not do this with any kind of agenda or expectation of getting anything back for this only sullies the gift and lessens the flow of love. It’s like handing someone a million dollars and yet being unable to open your fingers and actually let go of the check. Picture it being yanked back and forth, neither person having it.

         Now – remember the most important, and yet

most oft neglected relationship of all and dust off your personal positive regard: love yourself! After all, there is nothing about you that isn’t lovable, not even your deepest shadow parts. It’s all threads in the tapestry from which we weave our lives and all the pieces are necessary. The parts are simply tools that when used appropriately and in balance provide the pieces from which we put together our life lessons and learn to do things differently and better.

Thank you for spending this morning moment with me.

Aloha, peace and wellness, Holman

Starfish on the Beach

Feb. 23rd, 2003

Aloha and Good Morning,

         In my meditation, I found myself reflecting upon an old adage, a wonderful story you may be familiar with. 

         It tells the tale of an old man strolling along the beach. He catches sight of a young girl who appears to be dancing at the water’s edge. The old man slowly ambles closer, watching the girl as she bends down, straightens to her full height and casts her arm out in an arc. Drawing closer, he sees that the sand is littered with starfish and she is throwing them, one by one, back into the sea.

         The old man grumbles, “There are stranded starfish as far as the eye can see. What difference can saving a few of them possibly make?”
         Smiling, she stoops down and tosses another starfish out over the water, saying, “It made a difference to that one.”

         It always makes a difference when we chose to act out of kindness and love. And yet, so much of how we act seems based upon how we feel and so much of how we feel is based upon our thought processes and the habitual action/reaction reflex that rules our relationships until we take conscious control. Again, this is an action that must spring from our thoughts.

         So I reflected upon the events casting a pall of darkness over the heart of the world; I thought about the eruptions of unhappiness and conflict. Mostly, though, I reflected upon how these outward events are mirrored in my inner thinking. Are my inner thoughts on the verge of war? Do my inner thoughts create conflict within me -- or worse, create it without? It comes down to our choice of thoughts, fleeting or familiar as they wash up upon the beaches of our minds.

         Of the thousands of starfish thoughts that wash upon the shores of our being, which will we save? Which will we pick up and throw back into the sea? We have the choice. We can pick up thoughts of love, thoughts of radiant inner light, thoughts of God and the divine within us, thoughts of peace. We can pick up the thoughts that propel us forward upon the path to health and well-being. Or we can focus on the acid rains of negativity that pelt the inner sands of our mind. The one or the other, which will it be? And what will our thoughts manifest in our lives?

         A simple ill chosen word can manifest immediate hurt and unhappiness in our relationships; a simple and heartfelt “I love you,” can turn a gloomy day into a
sunburst of brightness. Both results are the product of the starfish thoughts we save from extinction, the thoughts we nurture with habitual repetition.

         May your thoughts propel you forward to a bright and beautiful day, one in which you chose peace, one in which you chose to “accentuate the positive, and illuminate the negative,” one in which you make the choice, consciously and with full awareness of where your thoughts, and as a result, your feelings will go.

Love and Aloha,
Holman

Stillness and Inner Peace

Mar. 9th, 2003

Aloha and Good Morning,

         After a frantic scramble to do everything that needed doing, I found myself taking a moment for reflection. My thoughts slowed, my breath deepened and a sigh of contentment escaped my lips for while everything in life may not be as fully perfect as I might wish it, yet I can find a perfectly peaceful place within me if I remember to go looking for it. Then my thoughts flowed to my family and friends, to all of you.

       When the gale force winds of political chaos and emotional uncertainty beat against you – stand in the sure foundation of your own inner peace and be not moved. Allow joy to spontaneously burst into your being, to enliven and enlighten your soul. The garden meadow of serenity and inward calm is a place best visited frequently, and yet how do we find it?

         Go within. Turning within, to the still heart-space inside, turns away the outward pressures that beset us daily. It really is as simple as that. It requires a willingness to let go of our attachments. It requires a conscious reassessment of what we really desire and therefore attract to us. It calls for an awareness of the emotions and energies we are projecting; an awareness that what we see in others often mirrors our own projections.

         I promise you this place lies within each of us. We seek it instinctively. We long for it. We look for it in our relationships, our jobs, our families, our sports and hobbies. Yet sooner or later, all those things inevitably fall short  and disappointment sets in. With disappointment comes doubt and with doubt, fears and uncertainly follow – All from looking to the wrong source to find the fulfillment of our needs, looking outside of ourselves, looking to others rather than developing the habit of looking within, the ability to become self-sourcing.

         Our partners can’t provide it, so we shouldn’t demand it of them. Rather let’s celebrate the joy of companionship and the sharing of strength and abilities. Let’s remember all the blessings and talents they bring to our shared table.

       

Two connected possibilities both bring us back to our birthright of peace, the kind of peace that is so fundamental that even when confusion, urgency, or the million distraction of life arise in our lives and our surfaces emotions are riled up -- the peace that abides is undisturbed. Our thoughts and emotions, our hearts and bodies may be boiling in the flaming oil of the encroaching army of life's circumstances, while eternal peace yet lies awaiting in our center place. You can sink deeper into your self until you get there. Or, inner peace can be found by reaching the hands of your heart and desire upward and grasping your own divinity, the divine part of your nature that is constantly looking down upon you and awaiting your call, awaiting its chance to pull you up into a space of unconditional love, a space without expectations or attachments. 

         Whether you gaze upward into the heavens of your own divinity, or sink downward into the still center of that divinity, it is the same.

         So as another day dawns and another week turns the pages of our calendars let’s all remember to simply love each other and our selves. Let's remember to nurture our inner child and look to our divine natures, thereby finding the peace within our selves that calls out to be celebrated, to laugh, to love, to dance, to sing, to simply appreciate all that is.



With love and aloha,
Holman

Today's Reflection and Response, May 20th, 2014   Experiencing these words again inspired an entire new post:  Black Holes and Happy Places . I can only hope they inspire you as well.

Aloha and the Divine Universe

March 17th, 2003
Aloha and Good Morning,

         As I packed for my annual pilgrimage to San Francisco for the Makahiki celebration that culminates with an opportunity to enter into the fire made sacred and walk upon her hot coals, I found myself reflecting upon my life and my hopes, my relationship and my desire to learn a better way of being, a better way of presenting myself, a better way of honoring and serving the beloveds in my life, my family and all of you.

         We do not live in a cold empty universe devoid of everything save a few pieces of swirling matter tumbling through the vastness of space. That may be an accurate description of how the physical universe seems to most people and yet are we not so much more than merely physical?

 Every living creature from the most advanced human being to the tiniest of viruses, and everything else, is an interconnected reflection of the Divine. I mean connected in the literal sense. Those who have eyes to see would perceive the tiny, spider web strands that stretch between all that is.

         The Hawaiian word Aloha, formed from the roots alo (Meaning to share) and ha (meaning breath, but also implying life and touching on the divine), can be translated as the breath of life that flows from the heart of god to me and through me to you – and from the heart of god to you and through you to me.  It has a similar

reciprocal symmetry to the equally beautiful Sanskrit word, Namaste, but with less shades of reverence and more entailments of the interconnected oneness of all things. As a word, it feels more matter of fact. The word aloha points to a profound sharing, for we are all connected and we are all one in our ultimate level of being. We cling to the illusion of separation because it is useful in our evolution. In my minds eye, I see that if one were to gather up all the shinning silver connections that flow from each of us to each of us and from there to everything else we would gaze upon the face of god.

       

 I believe that this divine, beautiful, interconnected universe is a conscious creation that acts like a womb for is it not the place in which we grow, develop and mature? Within the womb I believe we receive that which we truly desire even when we fail to recognize the form in which our desires return to us. I also believe that the energies and intentions that we consciously and unconsciously project outward always return. “Cast your bread upon the waters,” was the phrase Christ chose to teach this principle and its profound implications.

      

         So, this morning as my beloved partner arose to prepare for work and as I

arose to prepare for my trip, she made the comment “It must be nice.” My first thoughtless, automatic reaction was a burst of anger that flooded into my stomach at all the negative things I assumed she was implying by that comment.

         Then, after a moment to let the feeling flow through, I took a breath and found a place of stillness and into that stillness flooded an awareness that maybe, just maybe she was asking me for reassurance: reassurance that I notice and appreciate how hard she is working to support me and to help make my trip possible, that I notice and appreciate all the things she has to take on alone while I’m away, since I won’t be there to help her, and most importantly that I love her and will miss her while I am gone. My whole inner being changed and grew quiet in that moment of insight. And to myself I acknowledged, “Yeah, it really is nice.” This morning moment is my public acknowledgement of my appreciation for her and my appreciation for the moment of insight and growth presented by the universe in the form of a simple comment: “It must be nice.”

         I was remind once again that if I assume a negative response the divinely responsive universe will always provide opportunities in which people and events will response negatively to me. On the other hand, if I truly desire to live more positively, the universe will always provide opportunities in which my desire to be positive is challenged by seemingly negative events. In both cases the outward happenings could be exactly the same and yet one’s internal process is vastly different.

         I wish for all of you my deepest aloha in your personal journeys of growth and evolution. May we all begin to notice the growth opportunities the universe presents to us. So, as my partner would say: “Learn the lesson so you don't have to repeat it!” Indeed. May we all learn our lessons, not repeat them, and move on to the wonder and joy of being alive.

Love and Aloha,
Holman

The Makahiki Firewalk

Mar. 26th, 2003

         As I sat in the airplane, returning from my celebration of Makahiki and the firewalk leader/instructor training that followed, I pondered all the events I’d witnessed and participated in. There was board breaking, fire eating, some business with a needle; bending iron rebar and breaking arrows by placing them in the hollow of the throat and pressing forward with full commitment, and finally the firewalk.

         All these activities lack a certain degree of common sensibility, all of them fall outside what for most is normal reality and all of them inspire some degree of anxiety, fear or sheer terror. They are challenges, opportunities to transcend one’s perceived limitations and step into a new way of being, a deeper level of self definition.

         None of this may seem important in a world increasingly consumed by war

and unrest, and yet these are precisely the times when meeting our personal challenges become the most transformative. The events that unfold around us, when reduced to their ultimate core, seem to spring from a well fed by only two deep underground springs: love or fear. Some mixture of these primordial building blocks can be seen in all of our behaviors, in all of our reaction patterns and even in the events catapulting the course of human history in one direction or another. Human history may be too large a concept to take personal responsibility for and yet is not the history of humanity simply the collective cornucopia containing all of our individual choices?

         Sometimes our choices come down to something absolutely basic: to walk forward stepping on the red hot coals of life or to step aside; to face our fears or be faced down by them. This does not imply, in any way, that everyone at a firewalk should walk; rather, it applies to those who feel called to press forward against their reluctance and step off the edge of their comfort zone into the dangerous unknown.

         The fire roared fifteen feet into the sky. Sparks streamed heavenward with an aliveness that reminded me of fairies dancing. In time the flames gave way to coals glowing red hot beneath their slight blanketing of ash. The moment of truth arrived. There is a certain science and psychology to why a person can step on hot coals and not be burned horribly; but moreover, there is mystery and miracle, a touch of the Divine that carries one to safety on the other side of the coals. Still, fire calls forth an instinctive terror. Fire burns. We all know it in our deepest cellular memory. We have all shared the experience of being burned. It’s just plain scary to stand before the fire pit and know you have to either walk or stand aside, either exercise your faith or apologize later for its lack when one felt the call and ignored it.

         In the small space of this Morning Moment there is no way to adequately describe the emotions that surge through your body when you stand before the firewalk and feel its heat upon your face. It is the culmination of anticipation that builds and builds as you watch towering flames slowly consuming the huge, carefully stacked pile of wood, reducing it ember by ember into glowing, red hot coals. In case you're curious: The fire bed, with its shimmering, radiating, red hot coals averages between 200 and 800 degrees Fahrenheit, depending upon the exact spot you measure.

       A mother and her 12 year old daughter – both beautiful, wonderful women – came to our celebration. Neither had ever walked on fire before. You could see their emotions running high and almost hear the rapid beating of their hearts. Everyone present supported them as they worked up their courage and their energy. The mother walked. Her relationship to her own divinity deepened instantly. Her daughter really wanted to walk. She pumped her arms and marched around the yard. She approached the fire and hit the wall of her own fear. She stopped.

         “I can’t do it!” She cried. Around the yard she went again, again she marched up to the edge and stepped aside. Again she cried, “I can’t do it.” Yet she didn’t give up. She tried several more times, still unable to push through her fear of the fire. 

         Her mother came to her and said, “You can do it. I’ll walk with you and we’ll do it together.”

         So together they marched around the yard; together they built up their courage and their energy and their determination. Then they walked, arm in arm, across the hot coals and were not burned. I felt profoundly moved. We all did. The daughter, in a rush of excitement and joy, ran around and walked across the fire two or three more times. Everyone present felt the same rush of emotion. We all witnessed the bond between mother and daughter deepening and their love for each other overflow.

         The fire is a profound and sacred teacher.

       Thank you for spending this morning moment with me. May each of us, when we step up to our own personal firewalk, when fear and anxiety pumps into our bloodstream and ice into our stomach, in that moment may we remember the divinity that lies within, may we remember our limitlessness and walk forward across the hot coals of our fear and into the rush of emotion and love that lies on the other side.



Love and Aloha,
Holman

Thoughts on Sand

April 8th, 2003

Aloha and Good Morning,

So, I was thinking about sand. The other day a salesman stopped by our door. “Your life,” he explained, “Will never be complete until you own the world’s best vacuum cleaner.” Then he told us how sand ruins our rugs. Each tiny grain has up to seven sharp edges that cut and grind away the fibers.

So, I was thinking about sand. . . Sand and sharp edges. What are the sharp edges in my life that cut and grind? Some mornings my alarm clock alone has at least a hundred sharp edges. Who among us can’t find a hundred other things that offend our sensibilities?

We seem to smash up against the sharp edges of our expectations, our attachments and our relationships – where a single sharp word cuts into the heart of our beloveds, inflicting wounds that last from moments to months to a lifetime. We cut ourselves on the sharp edges of unconscious reaction patterns that reinforce negativity and hurt rather than invite love and warmth.

Then I thought some more and turned it around in my mind. It’s not about the jagged edges life presents to me. It’s about the jagged edges I present to life. In my soul there remain many sharp edges, the little hooks that catch and bind the smooth flow of my life, the natural energy and manifestation of the divine. This is neither good nor bad. Polishing down the sharp edges of our souls is simply one of our normal life processes. Meanwhile, awareness and compassion can cover our cutting edges; for in every moment, we have the ability to choose what part of ourselves we present: the harsh, hard edge or the vulnerable, soft, cuddly, squishy, teddy bear parts that gush spontaneous geysers of acceptance, love, warmth, compassion, laughter and joyfulness.

Besides, the sharp edges of sand can only be seen under great magnification.

When one pulls back and looks at the greater picture we see Zen gardens and the still space in the dune’s shadow, sand castles and children playing. We see lovers strolling hand in hand and the ocean tide’s eternal caresses. We see the softness in our partners touch and the love in the depths of her eyes. We see the oft silent struggle of everyone simply doing the best they know how. We see our part. We see the dignity, value and importance of creating a habitual reaction pattern that seeks the softness within ourselves, our heart space, our stillness, our balance. We come to the realization that the more we can gently give this part of ourselves to the beloveds beside us, the more love naturally flows back in the circular cycle of life.

        It bears repeating: if we fear anger, discomfort, disharmony or being fired from our jobs, the essential core energy of those emotions flow outward from us. Since energy is attracted to like energy, those emotions collect more of the same until finally they have enough energy in the dream world to manifest in the created world. In other words, our subconscious will always work to create the circumstances which we give energy to and we will inevitably find ourselves confronted by that which we desire the least. Rather, can we not create a self-embracing heart space and cast it upon the waters so that we can welcome its inevitable return?

         May your heart cling to joy, peace, and centeredness and may your soul’s
focus be the castles in the sand and not the sharp edges.

Love and Aloha,
Holman